1- Riding the subway can be annoying at times, but it can be made exponentially worse when someone sits next (snap!) to you and (Snap! SNAP! SNAP! SNAP!!) SNAPStheir damned (snap!) gum for the (Snap snap!!!) entire 30 (snap!) Minute (SNAP!!!!) trip. (snap snap snap snap snap snapsnapsnapsnap!)
2- No matter how little a child has eaten, the incredible size of their poop never fails to amaze a parent - even a battle hardened one.
3-Little kids fall, a lot. Its pretty damned funny.
4-Little kids don't like to be laughed at, but will hoot with laughter while they watch you tumble down a flight of steps.
5-Cooking shows are depressing because you will never, ever be able to have a kitchen like that.
6-The Twilight series is incredibly addictive, and most of the women that read it will find themselves wishing a vampire would love them at some point in their lives.
7-Men will always be fixated on the size of their penis. They start very early, as in a few weeks old type early- trying to lengthen it by pulling on the damned thing like a ripcord for a lawnmower. They never stop.
8-One of the most wonderful things about being an adult is the ability to rationalize having a Dove chocolate bar for breakfast with the following logic: "Because I am a grownup and I CAN. NO ONE CAN STOP ME."
What are your observations?

